Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
