Duck Duck Cougar?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Im part way to drunk.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
