She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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