there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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