I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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