First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize