quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
