Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
