You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
