This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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