there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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