just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Randomize
