I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I think your dad took our porno
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
