the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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