True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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