My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize