You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
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