I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize