While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
