just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
