weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Who died my cat blue again?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
