your room smells of hookers.
And success
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
