She said her name was "party"
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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