did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
They took my balls.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
