I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Alive.
So much puke
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
