GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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