So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
