I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
