Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 607 share tweet
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize