i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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