Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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