You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
