Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
