Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Randomize
