absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I was not drunk enough for that final.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
