You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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