I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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