the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Dicks are not precious.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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