What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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