Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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