he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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