Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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