It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
