dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
