Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
My bed smells like the plague
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
