So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Randomize
