haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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