Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
