Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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