when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
